A month or so ago, I met up with someone for a cup of coffee. Since moving to Germany last year, my all-encompassing loneliness has been much like a drunk, washed up glam metal rockstar from 1982: out of control, sporting an aggressive mullet, and begging for attention. As a result, I’ve been making waaaaaay more of an effort to meet new people. All in all, the person I hung out with was great. We swapped stories about life in Germany (she’s a transplant, too), belly laughed about bizarre German traditions, and talked about how hard it is living in [...]

I found a new trail this morning. I've never ever noticed it before, despite it branching off from a trail I run on at least 3 times a week. I don't know why today was the day that I noticed it. Maybe because Leonard Cohen died and I was thinking about him and light and dark and life and death and everything in between. The trail caught my eye as I shot past it and so I stopped, trotted back a fewmetres and stood at the foot of it, in awe of the autumnness that appeared to have exploded there. [...]

You are enough. I bet you’ve seen that somewhere before, haven’t you? Probably on Instagram. Or Facebook. A pretty picture emblazoned with the words, “You Are Enough”, in a really cool font with a blurred out background of a very attractive person gazing mindfully into the distance. There’s probably a mountain. Or an ocean. And that very attractive person in the pretty picture is definitely wearing white and is barefoot. That person feels all enough. You don’t need to gaze at a mountain or an ocean or do yoga or meditate or drink green smoothies to feel enough, you know. [...]

It's Sunday morning. Last Sunday morning, to be precise. I'm swimming in the local pool. I want to get a good hour of swimming in before the day ahead. The day ahead involves being naked. And sitting in a sauna with up to 20 other naked people. Naked German people. When my friends visit me here in Germany, I take them to the sauna. They think it is awesome and weird and the most relaxing experience. And it is. Truly. So. I'm swimming in the pool. I'm probably 30 lengths into the 100 I plan on completing. The lane I [...]

Feeling stuck, bored and “is this it?” is shit with a capital S, right? I know it well. It’s that dull feeling in your head. It’s the numbness, the frustration, the inertia, the overwhelming spiral of just not knowing what to do but knowing you need to do something. And it loops over and over. Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. 7 years ago, I was in a corporate job I hated; the environment was bullshitty-sales, eye-rolling conference calls and pointless PowerPoint presentations and, well, all very depressingly un-me. I knew that there was something else out there I could be doing. Thing is, I didn’t have the first [...]

My friend sent me a card the other day. On the front it says, "All up in the club like I want to go home." It made me laugh. It's me all over. I've never really enjoyed parties. By 10pm I'm eyeing the door, exhausted from all the small-talk and noise and overwhelmed by the music and people. For a long time in my life, I felt like a fucking weirdo for feeling like this. And I also felt like a massive fake and contradiction. I find being around people exhausting, you see. And yet I love being around people—and as a coach—spend a [...]

Around mile 4, I wanted to swim to the shore of the lake and get out. The lake was choppy. Far choppier than anything I'd swum in before, and I started to feel sea (lake?) sick. Every time I raised my head to spot one of the giant orange buoys that bobbed in the lake, guiding the way, all I could see around me was grey swell accompanied by sheets of heavy rain. With each tiring swim stroke, I mentally rehearsed the conversations I'd have with my family and friend, Laura—who I knew were waiting for me just a mile away at the [...]

Harvesting season is coming to an end here in rural Germany. Since our move here, well over a year ago now, I have become keenly aware of each season and the way village life weaves around and through the year's rhythms. Seasons make way for the next, and each one brings with it an age-old tradition; whether it's preparing the farmland for the cold, frosty winters that freeze the fields hard, or picking ripe apples and plums straight from the trees in the summer, the farmers gently move in time with the year. My father-in-law is a farmer. He spends most of the summer out in the fields, [...]

Growing up, I remember regularly being told how much I was loved—mostly by my Dad. It's a Goodchild family thing. We tell each other that we love each other, whether it's spoken or via text or a message on Facebook. Growing up, my partner, Kristin, was rarely, if ever told how much she was loved. It's a German thing, apparently. Germans don't take saying "I love you" lightly. The German noun, "Liebe" (love) is a serious word, never used just as a term of endearment or used platonically, with a family member. Kristin and I have been together for 6 years [...]

"What happens when everything is done on the to-do list? Do we go home?" The eighteen year old, fresh-out-of-college company junior asked his new team. His colleagues, one of them my partner, Kristin—who'd spent years and years working for the company—rolled their eyes, partly incredulous, partly amused, and replied, "There is no end! Once we've finished this project, there'll be another one and another. It never ends, you don't get to go home just because everything is done. This is what work is. Get used to it." The young intern sloped off, embarrassed. And confused. We've become a to-do list culture, [...]