When my sister and I were kids, we both had hamsters as pets. I can't remember what my sister's hamster was called, but mine was called 'Pocket'. Pocket was grey and my sister's hamster was ginger and white. We kept our hamsters in our respective bedrooms. I took a lot of time making sure that Pocket's cage was clean and that his little bedroom area was full of this weird cotton wool type stuff that he liked to sleep in. He always had fresh water and his food bowl was full to the brim with his favourite food. My sister's [...]

"I have built a very comfortable cage for myself." A thoughtful client said this to me in our session this morning. Which reminded me of something that also happened this morning. My mother-in-law took my kid to this kind of restaurant place that also has an animal park attached to it. I visited it last year, hoping to see the goats and donkeys and ducks that were shown on the website. What I didn't know was that there was also a lion there. And a tiger. A lion and a tiger, each in tiny, poky cages, in which both these [...]

"Live each day as if it's your last." It's really fucking stupid advice if you ask me. Want to know what I'd do if I knew today was my last day on earth? I'd hug my kid. I'd declare my undying love for my partner. I'd call my friends and tell them how much they mean to me. I'd spend time with my family and look into their eyes and we'd warmly recount old stories while flicking through photo albums and letting go of all of our past pain. Actually, I wouldn't do any of that. I'd probably do a [...]

"I am regularly asked to speak at exciting conferences and events." I wrote that in my journal a year or so ago. I regularly write down what I want from my life. I think it was Oprah Winfrey who said "'Create the highest, grandest vision possible for your life, because you become what you believe" and although that quote makes me roll my eyes because it sounds so cliche and loaded with double self-development cheese, she has a point. Some people call it "manifesting". Some people call it a "positive visualisation practice". Some people call it "asking The Universe". I [...]

I used to keep a folder on my laptop desktop. It was full of free e-books and pdf-guides I'd downloaded from websites. The e-books and pdfs were called things like "How to grow your business in 7 easy steps!" and "Your free guide to an overnight six-figure income from working 2 hours a day on a beach in Bali!" I deleted that desktop folder. I realised I would never read any of it. Some of the free stuff you get from websites is not always that great, which is why it's important to me that when I do have something for free on my [...]

You have an idea. A dream. A goal. And when you think about it, you feel a heady connection of excitement and nerves and "Oh! Wouldn't it be brilliant if!" and joy! All the joy! All the butterflies! All the woohoos! All the running around your house whooping like a deranged monkey in just your pants! All the waheys! All the glee! All the enthusiasm! All the exhilaration! And then you talk yourself out of it. Ugh. You pull the handbrake. You get scared. You start making excuses. You hesitate. You think you can't do it. You believe there's no way it's actually going to be possible..... Well. [...]

I was talking to one of my awesome clients the other day. He's unhappy in his marriage. He's considering leaving. He's in a lot of pain right now. He is suffering. He says things to me like, "If I do leave, I don't want to hurt her, Liz. I feel like the worst human being in the world." I tell him that I don't think he is the worse person in the world, far from it, but that I also understand why he feels that way. And I agree with him, that it's very possible that there will be hurt. A lot [...]

5 years ago, when I was training as a coach, part of the very drawn out accreditation process involved submitting taped recordings of 'practice' client sessions for assessment. I failed the assessment. I was nervous, bumbly and new to coaching and the recorded sessions highlighted that. I didn't think through the questions I asked and I raced through the session, desperate to get it over so I could stop the recording. I've never been one for performing under pressure, although, weirdly, I love public speaking. Also: during the recordings, one practice client—very sweetly but not all that helpfully—kept interrupting our session [...]

I spent last weekend training in existential coaching—learning more about how to help answer the profound and often confusing questions so many of us have about life: Why am I here? What does it all mean? Life is so short, what's the point in striving? How can I live a more fulfilling, purposeful life? What should I have for dinner? Big stuff, you know. The truth is, most people don't want to find or know the answers. Most people would rather drown it all out with TV and scrolling through shit on social media and conversations about the weather and what Kim Kardashian wore or didn't wear and [...]

If you're the kind of person who can eat just the one biscuit without automatically ramming the rest of the packet in your mouth straight after, or you wake up bright and early every single morning and skip to the gym because YOU LOVE WORKING OUT SO MUCH, or you go after every opportunity in life with gung-ho gusto, this email probably isn’t going to be of much interest to you. For the rest of us, I want to let you in on something: I didn’t feel like getting up at 6.30am this morning. But I did. I didn’t feel like exercising at 7am this morning. But I did. I didn’t feel like being thoughtful and understanding (yet [...]